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Six Finger Handshake

by Parking Garage

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about

Exactly one year ago, I got engaged to the most perfect creature I've ever known with this song. It cemented what we already knew about each other since we started dating in that we were destined to become one.

Initially, the idea was to record on the July 30th weekend with two different versions (the original that you hear now, and another version with a proposal during the spoken word bit). I would show the second version to my partner, Rafal, a couple days later, saying that it's a rough mix and I wanted their opinion of what could be improved. Then, as the proposal came up in the song, I would get down on one knee and mouth the words in the mix as I opened the little ring box. I had everything lined up for the perfect surprise, especially since they would be in the studio with us the first day laying down the trumpet track. I even did a sneaky little investigation where I would put my hand against theirs when we cuddled to try and gauge the size of their ring finger, playing it off as a cutesy "let's see how small your hand is compared to mine."

However, as we were set to go track with Tommy at WBAZ Records at the end of the month, he ended up pushing our session back to September due to accidentally double-booking the date. This set the proposal back for a lot of reasons: 1. our previous drummer Casey was going to be leaving our band come August to focus on grad school, leaving us to scramble in order to find a new drummer in time for the session; 2. we ended up having to move out of an old rehearsal space between these dates, causing lots of rifts in trying to practice the song without getting noise complaints from wherever we ended up; and 3. there was just a pure spiral of depression the wait led me down, wondering if it was all some kind of divine intervention saying that this isn't the right time.

Rafal was super concerned when I reacted so hard to the news that our session got pushed back, of course not knowing that this was going to be a lot more than just some studio time for our band. To me, this was about making our bond the deepest it could ever be, professing my love in a microphone so everyone could hear it, showing the world that we are inseparable regardless of the circumstances, and so many other things beyond the surface reasoning. Yet, as the date for the session shifted back again into October now, everything started to sink further and further mentally, wondering whether getting engaged was even the right thing to do at all. However, as I looked back at the song itself, there was this self-fulfilling air I realized in regards to the darkest days resulting in some of the greatest connections, how the ugliest moments can make the most beautiful things in process, and this was the key I needed to keep moving along.

And so, the game plan changed. I couldn't wait for a rough mix to be made to surprise my partner, so the surprise was gonna have to come into the studio with us instead. The new idea was to kneel while hiding and wait until after Rafal finished their trumpet tracks with the ring box, but bringing this up to Tommy revealed the logistical confines of the studio meant this would be impossible to pull off. Instead he suggested something that would include the intensity of the emotion in the final recording while also managing to keep everything as unassuming as possible for the proposal. Near the end of the first session, Tommy will come in saying that we should lay down some scratch vocals to help with the second day of the session. At that point, I'll ask Rafal if they could be in the same room as me just for moral support at which point I'll switch to the second set of lyrics idealized from the first plan made months prior.

This was going to be it. This would be the moment where everything finally went right. In a sea of so many things going wrong, at least we could finally look back at this moment and say, "We did something beautiful here."

October 2nd, we stayed the night up in Athens at my soon-to-be parents-in-law’s house because we were still living in Milledgeville for college at the time. Not to mention we would be performing for the Historic Athens Porchfest right before the studio time. Porchfest was a really cool experience, even if we didn't get to see much of it before or after due to the studio time planned right after. Huge props to Jennifer Madison for hosting us and making us feel at home in their guest house's dainty alcove, by the way. It would also be the first time performing "Six Finger Handshake" publicly in any capacity. We thought including it in the setlist would be a good way to practice before the actual recording. However, during the spoken section in the third part, I almost go into the proposal monologue. It was a minor slip up, that I ultimately recovered from in the moment, but it definitely made me scared that I was about to give everything away. Thankfully, Rafal still didn't suspect a thing, instead being concerned that I was just dehydrated from the heat on that day.

After breaking everything down at around 4:30, we moved shop to WBAZ Records to record the live band portions. It was a bit ago, but I remember the final track we used taking only about six or seven tries before we got all the rhythm guitar, bass, and drums recorded in a single take. There were some overdubs for the solo as well as a few mix-ups in the bass part that needed correcting, but otherwise, all the fundamentals were finished in one take by seven o'clock. A twelve and a half minute song with parts all in one take; I couldn't ask for better bandmates to be honest. Then we added trumpets since that would be our only day we had for recording the horns with Rafal. Their lips were already burnt out from the Porchfest show, but they managed to run through the whole song enough times for double-tracking, and the fact that my partner did so much trumpeting in one day without fail is a feat in itself.

By the time everything was done with the trumpets at around 9pm, we were all on the verge of passing out. It'd been a long day, and none of us had eaten anything since at least 2pm. I was scared that we were running out of time to get to the "scratch vocals" part of the session. Rafal was wanting to leave since it was a Sunday and they had college classes in the morning in a town almost two hours away. Somehow, I managed to convince them to stay just for one quick run-through before Nathan had to drive them back home for the tons of responsibilities. While they went to use the restroom before the final take of the night, Tommy came into the recording area with a second set of headphones and asked me if I was ready. At that moment, I do not remember what I said, and as a matter of fact, I was almost paralyzed, terrified I might get something wrong. Even if we were going to do more takes the next day, it was more on the principle that this is a performance of my gratitude, my passion, my desire to make this connection something that lasts. If I messed it up here, then what does that say about our future?

By the time I was no longer dissociating, I was brought back in by the sound of the opening guitar riff. No time to second-guess: I'm here now. Rafal was sitting on the couch in front, looking at me like a deer would a thick pine tree, knowing that there was everything they needed right here in necessities and yet without realizing the moment that would come. My voice was shaking in a lot of spots in the first part, and there was a nervous tension I felt that made Rafal's gaze all the more comforting in its pure warmth. By the end of it, the shaking was more from lots of movement through the pure joy in between the two of us, though that could've also just been a defense mechanism against the nerves as well. Then came the second third of the song which was the hardest to get through in that timeframe. It reveals a lot of insecurities about the both of us, and to just toss that in with the declarations of euphoria before then made it all the harder to proclaim alongside it. But that's what "in sickness and in health" is for, right? I was on the verge of tearing up by the final part of that section because I knew that they already did accept me for my poor mental health before in real life, so it was just a matter of a few minutes now before they could possibly say yes.

Finally, the reprise. When I finally got to switch up that spoken word portion for the section of a proper proposal like I almost did at Porchfest five hours ago, their whole body perked up in a way that I could not express in words alone. It was like a squirrel when they hear the leaves rustling but in slow-motion and with almost a Hollywood air of picturesqueness to it all. There was still a whole last verse and chorus to the song left after that particular moment, but that just meant that I had to make everything in those last couple of minutes the best that they will ever hear this song be performed. Just for them. And when I tell you I poured everything I had left in me from that workload of a day in those final moments, you best believe me when in fact that's the take we used for the final mix here. I had to scream it with all the impurities I possessed, with all the elation I could express, with all the air within my chest, with everything left of me from that day here. Of course, one thing that we had to cut from the mix was the final question and our reactions to each other.

No one will ever hear the reaction from Rafal the way that I did that night, through their voice in person as well as through the system of wires in the studio that lead right to the headphones. We hugged the tightest we've ever held an embrace, like we were jigsaw puzzle pieces glued together in frame. Even the smallest movements and noises of glee were reverberated in my skull through that set-up in the studio even until now, as I type this out. And even if I tried to recreate that timeframe, I don't think I could capture specifically what happened in the moment the same way as it was then, and telling the truth, that's the beauty of it all. While some tokens of our love will be captured forever, like this song, some will remain remembered and experienced only by those in the moment just like these little sounds of the slightest motions in response to emotion.

lyrics

Lyrics:

I remember
I wanted to tell you, “I love you,” when I told you, “I like you”
You said we could meet up again, up in Athens over the summer
I remember
I wanted to tell you when you sat in the back of that philosophy class
But I couldn’t bring myself to do it
Because those three damn words ended my last three relationships

So now we sit in the botanical gardens
Waiting for the flowers to give me the oxygen
To filter my lungs
And go to my brain
To give me the thoughts
To ration the heart to ask you now

I wanna give you a six finger handshake
Not around your hand, but your body, if that makes sense
I just want to see what we can make
And if we can draw the most out from the less
I wanna be friends
I wanna be more than friends
I wanna be brothers
I wanna be your significant other
Or maybe something more specific than that
I want you to mold me however to your heart’s content
So I can be the clay on top of your pedestal
And you can be my Patrick Swayze
Though I know you don’t get that reference yet
(But soon you will)

I was stuck in a hospital in Valdosta for twelve whole days
I would’ve gotten out of there sooner if my
Doc wasn’t so fixated on drugging me up
Instead of realizing what Asperger’s was
I left there with more problems than I came in with

You called me the day right after I got out
You had so much concern in your voice
Turns out that was just the way you talked
But in that moment you were also expressing concern

My tongue and lips were all swollen
And my body would just constantly stiffen
Turns out, that was just a common reaction
To the medication I blame it on the misdiagnosis, but oh well
Oh well

I remember
I was on the verge of slurring all my words out in Blackbird’s
But you knew to be patient!
And I appreciate you for that
I appreciate you for a lot of other reasons
But that is the one to which I will always return

I wanna give you a six finger handshake
Not around your hand but your bodice! If that makes sense
I wanna give unto you more than I take
Because you’re a person deserving of that kind of love
I wanna show you the world
I wanna show the world you
I wanna give you it all
I wanna give you what’s due
Because your rabbit-like anxiety has haunted you for far too long
You see the universe in amazing detail
Perhaps a little too outstanding for you to handle
But that’s okay because I’ll there to pick you up no matter what

And I know we have issues of our own
But we can work on them
And get better together
Together forever
Forever unsevered
And I know not everything’s set in stone
But we can do that when we’re dead
Because right now we’re fluid
And we don’t care that our bones tell us otherwise
As long as we’re together
I’m certain we’ll make it to the other side
I know that you’re scared
But I’ll be there to protect you every time

I wanna give you a six finger handshake
Well it doesn’t even need to make sense to us anymore
We can dance to communicate and leave all our languages at the door
We can make our own music, kudzu leaves all on the floor
We can build our world, and still have things left to explore

I can tell we have different worlds to express
But when we act on them it seems like we just do it to transgress
The way you wanna be makes me think you’re better off as a hermit
But the way that I talk out makes you think that I am looking for a death wish
I know it's hard to explain your discomfort
In fact I know it’s more irrational to ask for you to do so
Nothing’s wrong with either state
It’s just hard for me to congregate with you
Knowing what you’re looking for

But in the end
Who are we
But empty cells
Transforming

I don’t know how it feels
To be scared of drugs
You don’t know how it feels
To be scared of love
We don’t know how it feels
To be either or
So I guess that we will
Wait for it

In the end
To begin
In the end
We’ll begin

I’m sorry I’m so selfish
I’ve just been hellishly embellishing
Everything I’ve been writing down
I just wish I could do the same thing for these chords
So all my words for you will perfectly align
I’m slowly turning into you
And that would be okay
If we just both didn’t hate ourselves
Cuz now I’m scared that you’ll hate me too
I’m sorry
I’ve just grown so attached
That I’m terrified of the withdrawal
I’ve already been through a week without my medicine
Your love for me is heaven-sent
But I’m scared that I’m bleeding you dry
And this oasis is just a mirage
My intrusive thoughts will form a collage
And now my visions blurry again

But then you say it all will be okay
And that’s enough for me to remain sane

Sorry for breaking down back there haha!
Listen, I know I’m not the best at writing stuff that make other people feel good
But you know more than anyone that practice makes perfect
People keep telling me that the best songs are always the saddest ones
As if they haven’t heard “Run Away With Me” by Carly Rae Jepsen
Or really anything from her ground-breaking, critically acclaimed 2015 album E-MO-TION
I don’t really know where I was going with that to be honest
But, but, but look, the whole point is that
I’m tired of trying to fight my fires with more fire
Especially when it comes with the added bonus of pessimistic elitism in all kinds of art
I’m tired of having to look at my compassion as a weakness
When it’s the best drug I’ve ever taken
And it’s all thanks to you

Woah hey!
Somebody get Will Toledo on the phone
I just want him to pick up and pass the celly to my partner
I just wanna see their face light up like
When they met 100 gecs
Outside that Brockhampton concert
It was somewhat awkward
But we get to relish in the moment right afterwards
We’re living life just as we know it

Woah hey!
Someday I pray to get Wolfgun and Tally Hall
To play our anniversary somehow
But I hope this song will do for now
Because I got a long way to go
Til I’m in the Low Yoyo
Hendershot's, 40 Watt’s, then to Clocked
I wanna be your peanut butter falafel burger with pistachio ice cream on top
Or you know, something just as important

I still have that heart-shaped leaf that you found
Last June on the dashboard of my car
It’s dried up a bunch and I still hear the crunch
Every time that I turn the defroster on
But it’s been there for almost a year now
If that’s not a sign, then I don’t know what
And with these metaphors out of the way
I just wanna hold you and say

Wïmutu
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you!
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you I love you!
I love you, I love you, I love you!
Oh love, love
I love you oh oh!
I love you oh oh!
I love you, love you, oh!
Oh oh, oh, oh oh oh!

I’ll love you until my heart stops beating
But as long as you’re here
My heart will never stop beating for you
My heart will never stop beating for you!
Oh oh!
I’ll love you even when we lose all of our form
Cuz you know that our souls will go on to become something more
We’ll extend to become something more
Oh oh oh

I wanna give you a six finger handshake
So I can show you a flower with steel for a stem!
I wanna give you a six finger handshake
I love you so much

credits

released October 2, 2023
Dakota Snow: vocals, bass, acoustic guitar, piano, saxophone
Nathan Whatley: electric guitar
Zach Ross: drums
Rafal: trumpet
Tommy Trautwein: recording, engineering, mixing
Jesse Mangum: mastering

Written by Dakota Snow
Recorded at WBAZ Records on October 2nd, 2022
Mastered at The Glow Recording Studio on July 12th, 2023

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Parking Garage Athens, Georgia

Parking Garage is a power trio from Milledgeville, Georgia, that has a crippling addiction to salt, that they hope isn't too noticeable in their music.

Nathan - guitar
Dakota - bass
Casey - drums

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